I was recently asked by the CFO of a tech company, How can we make the learning from the professional development events we do, stick? So I went ahead and wrote this article…
Check out this article on LinkedIn: How can we make the learning from Professional Development Stick
Enjoy!
Emily
Diana Golden Brosnihan, a brilliant skier. Diana won 19 Gold medals in world competition.
How do you go about setting and attaining goals?
What challenges do you face when setting goals?
How do you hold yourself accountable for accomplishing a goal?
How do you know when you are successful?
How do you celebrate success?
Setting goals and how one attains them can differ between the athlete and the executive. With the end result being success for both, it differs in how one’s goals are identified and what role the coach plays. The skier may tell their coach their overall goal of wanting to ski all the intermediate terrain comfortably. The ski coach then identifies what the skier’s needs are to accomplish this and creates the smaller goals or stepping stones for their student, telling them and showing them what to do and how to do it. They encourage and provide feedback throughout, even skiing down the hill in order to literally mirror proper movements for them; perhaps even manipulating them physically so they may feel the correct positioning.
The executive coach questions, providing space for the client to explore possibilities and express how they see, feel, or think about things. Instead of focusing on what the coach thinks, an executive coach focuses on the client’s thoughts and ideas. It is a conversation to provoke thought and bring out of the executive his or her own goals and direction they want to go; guiding the executive to identify for themselves what the path is (obstacles and resources) to get them to their goal. Executive coaching includes mirroring also, but it’s mirroring the client’s words back to them and asking for more depth of vision.
The executive coach focuses on repeating the positive statements and rephrases in an affirmative way so as to support clear, positive, proactive thought patterns; similar to how the sports coach performs the maneuvers in the correct way, leading the student to see positive movement patterns with the goal of creating the correct image for the student. Through open-ended questioning, the executive coach listens to what the client says so they can identify what the client wants. The coach then takes the very words of the client, without analyzing or judging, and reflects them back to their client.
The scope of goals for an executive is broad and can range from any issue in the person’s life to one particular project in a particular area. This broad scope arena for goal options means the look of success for an executive is just as broad. The coach for the executive then uses their fine-tuned skills to help guide the executive to clarify and pinpoint particular goals and then prioritize them. Through further questioning to bring out existing resources and strengths, the executive coach helps the client to identify action steps and timelines as well as measures for success.
While the sports coach takes into consideration confidence levels, analyzes movement and then teaches and advises. The executive coach brings about awareness through discussion, plus exploration of their client’s wants, thoughts, and behaviors. Awareness is enlightening to the executive, just as it is to the athlete. Sports and executive coaches both seek to empower their student/client and provide action steps and timelines for making change based on new awarenesses of body mind and spirit.
In part 4, I address risk taking and behavior change.
Women’s speed coach Chris Knight coaches Lindsey Vonn to one of her most successful seasons. (Getty Images/Agence Zoom-Alexis Boichard)
How do you see your self as a leader?
How do others see you as a leader?
What do you understand about your own vulnerabilities?
How do you respond when you feel fear?
What actions are you taking to address fruitless behaviors?
One’s relationship with his or her coach, whether for sports, health and fitness, or career is of the utmost importance. The value and effectiveness of the coaching relationship are based on openness and honesty where vulnerability is accepted and even expected. Trust and acceptance are key in this relationship. Often, the student of a sports coach looks up to them as a mentor and role model, even a philosopher of sorts. Most athletes will tell you they tend to perform better when their coach is present, supporting, analyzing, and providing feedback to improve performance. With executives, they are a client, not a student, and their coaches play more of partnership role, typically only present before and after an event such as a meeting. Regardless, the power of the relationship can often follow the executive into the meeting, providing a sense of supporting presence.
When asking coaches about how they view these relationships the sports coach often responds they think of their students as protégés’ or mentees. Sports coaches express their respect for their students, and the courage and dedication they have to their sport and their body.
The sports coach, being a coach because they have often reached the level of expertise in the sport themselves, respects the process the athlete is going through. They understand the motivation, determination and focus required to train and attain the level of skill to be a professional athlete. The sports coach relates to the whole-body/whole-person commitment to their sport and their body as their tool and that is part of where the value of having a coach comes in for the athlete.
The relationship between the executive and the executive coach has its similarities in many respects. Questioning people who have an executive coach, they express great respect and even gratitude for having the ear of one who understands the training and commitments required to emotionally and intellectually endure and maneuver the politics, emotions, and competitiveness that come with working in the business world.
Executive coaches express the respect they have for their clients comes from the very reason they are there to coach—the client’s commitment to endure and navigate the business world and all the challenging terrain that comes with it. An executive’s commitment to their mission, their job responsibilities, and to the people involved such as the staff, partners, clients, and the community at large is impressive and certainly respected by the executive coach.
Their accomplishments and resume are something to be respected as well; often it is the day-to-day existence that is the most impressive to the executive coach. Just as the day’s performance on the course for the ski racer is the ultimate impressive element of the athlete’s performance, the day’s performance in a meeting or challenging encounter can be the ultimate impressive element of the executive’s performance. The coaching relationship, whether for the athlete or the executive, requires trust and honesty for the student/client, with their success as the ultimate goal.
An important role of the sports coach is the ability to literally see and analyze the performance of the athlete. In a sense, the athlete is performing blind in the visual sense and their poor movement patterns are blind spots. Unless athletes see themselves on video, they are literally unable to see themselves. Similar to the athlete, it can be challenging for an executive to see themselves and how they appear in the field. What differs is that the type of blind spot is based simply on their humanness instead of physical performance; each produces its own type of vulnerabilities.
My take on the executive’s blind spots boils down to ego, unwise intentions, or over-confidence. Athletes also deal with ego, over-confidence, and competition—in fact, these things are huge barriers to success for the athlete. It is different though in the sense that a physical vulnerability such as athletic performance, is concrete and tangible with clear goals for change, whereas leadership vulnerabilities may be more personal, more about who the person is and how they are in their world. This difference of physical change versus way-of-being change creates a vulnerability much harder to see and admit to as well as change for the executive than for the athlete.
Another difference that stands out to me is that for the athlete, it is most often when they reach the top level of their field that they deal with these issues, whereas the executive may deal with such challenges at any point during their development. Having a coach to help manage these challenges are important for both the executive and the athlete, with the strength of the relationship being key.
Similar to a new skier, when executives encounter new terrain, it can be scary, creating vulnerability they are uncomfortable expressing for fear of looking weak or incompetent. Both the athlete and the executive face fear. Many blind spots are based on fear. The skier leans back when they are hesitant or afraid of the terrain or the speed they are gaining and I think that is an accurate statement and a good analogy for the executive as well—they lean out from, instead of into, the table or the conversation or the situation when the terrain is unfamiliar, picks up too much momentum, or gets bumpy.
This is where the coach comes in and adds value by implementing the delicate skill of helping to create awareness, for example, creating awareness of when in the process of their success did fear start to set in. The awareness may be as deep seeded as the use of early-learned survival behaviors in their family unit or in their social circles or it may be as surface as just never having experienced a particular situation; similar to the skier’s fear that happens when approaching unfamiliar terrain.
One executive I worked with shared she took on the role of mean girl in school and learned not to trust people because of witnessing gossip among her friends. The way in which she survived this experience was by distrusting and pushing her way over people. This learned behavior is very similar to what an athlete experiences if they learn poor movement patterns such as muscling one’s way through the bumpy terrain instead of balanced alignment allowing flow through the bumps. The way past these learned patterns of behavior are similar for both the athlete and the executive and can be changed through supportive coaching that creates awareness of challenging patterns while promoting positive ones.
The ski coach provides the resources in the form of physical skill building for the skier, knowing what terrain to put them on to practice those skills in order to own them and build confidence. Similar to the ski coach providing exercises for skill building and action steps that address the fear, the executive coach helps the client explore situations and resources and mirrors back what the executive is sharing, empowering them to see themselves. Both types of coaches provide guidance so the student/client can reach the top of the mountain without breaking their own leg or anyone else’s, if that is their goal. The difference in the relationship with the coach for the executive is that the executive has the answers whereas the athlete looks to his or her coach.
The relationship between the coach and the student/client is based on trust and respect. The student/client must feel comfortable being vulnerable and letting, even hoping, the coach sees them completely.
In part three of this series I address setting and attaining goals.
A recent coaching session began with the client asking me, “How does one creating trusting surroundings?”
This leader was struggling to enter into a new position and had the goal of building trust among his team. I loved that he cared so much about this because when people experience trust in their situation they are motivated to learn and be more productive.
Here are the highlights of what my client came to through our coaching session:
The importance of confidentiality, especially from leadership is critical to Creating A Trusting Environment. Trusting one’s leader promotes each team member to trust one another and this promotes genuine behaviors and team members showing up as their authentic selves.
How will your workplace surroundings change, and What Creating A Trusting scenarioas team members whole-heartedly trust leadership?
Coaching provides a solid checkpoint for leaders to enhance their workplace surroundings.
Request a complimentary Leadership Enhancement session today!
It’s common in today’s society to suddenly find one’s self in the role of caregiver to a friend or family member. Caregiving is emotionally charged on top of being another full-time job with a host of responsibilities.
I just finished setting up a Caring Bridge account for yet another friend beginning their journey with cancer. It causes a heaviness that I bring with me to work and other parts of my day. How can I go on with my life lightly as my friend is fighting to keep hers?
Many of us have experience with loss and grief but that doesn’t make it any easier. I have been volunteering with hospice for decades, yet I still go through the inevitable cycle of grief that comes with the territory.
Hospice encourages supporting caregivers with respite; any kind of respite you can offer: time away for a walk, an ear to listen without offering solutions; a precooked meal; or any simple gesture of support.
I believe the best thing a caregiver can do is take care of one’s self first. I know it sounds counterintuitive but it is similar to what they tell you on the airplane about the oxygen mask… put it on yourself before putting it on your baby because you can’t help your baby if you can’t breath.
Some examples of taking care of yourself in the caregiver role include accepting help every time it is offered, allowing yourself to take breaks, taking the time to do something you enjoy, getting enough sleep and having a confidant.
Yet, how are we to handle that heavy ache at work? How can we stop the crusade we find ourselves on to take on the medical aspects as well as handle the other challenges of life such as if there are young children and financial issues and animals and…and…and…
One client shared, “I feel very purposeful caring for my mom yet the one thing I crave is time to sit alone and think about how things are unfolding.” While another client shared, “I am so busy between work and caregiving that when I do have a free moment all I want to do is go wander aimlessly around the mall and just look at and touch everything but I feel so guilty wasting precious time.” These things may seem simple but they are not; they are important survival tactics and in the end will make each moment more valuable.
Balancing caregiving with the rest of one’s life the demands of one’s career with the demands of the other aspects of one’s life fills the hours of the day easily. Adding the role of caregiver means needing help. Therefore, finding balance among the important roles in your life is critical and the best way to take care of you.
How are you taking care of yourself so work and life are balanced?
Coaching is a great way to take care of one’s self and many coaches offer a free introductory session.